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Rich but empty

Filling The gap: What’s Missing?

By | Advice from Julie Murphy Casserly, Blog, Rich but empty | No Comments

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Sometimes, being “rich” in others eyes means that your life is perfect. To those around you, you already “have it all.” A great spouse. Healthy kids. A job you like. And friends that make you happy.

But you feel something is missing.

You can’t put your finger on it, but you know that your rich life isn’t completing you the way it had been previously. This doesn’t mean that you’re unhappy. Quite the contrary – you love so many things in your life and feel grateful for all of the wonderful opportunities and people that surround you on a daily and weekly basis.

Yet, there’s a hole. It’s small enough to have been easily ignored for a while, but you’ve come to a place where it’s time for it to be addressed.

I want to stress that it is perfectly acceptable to have these feelings. Just because you have everything on paper, it doesn’t mean you’re fulfilled in every area of your life. Judgment comes in all forms. It’s the friends who passively gloss over your concern about something your boss said about your work; after all, you have a great paying job that you actually like so there’s no real problem there.

It’s incredibly easy for people to base their entire opinion on something from what they see on the surface. People, even those close to you, feel that they can judge your life based on what you choose to show them. And if your life appears to be great, some may view your concerns as unwarranted.

So where do you go from here? First off, you accept that you are lucky to be in the position that you’re in. To have a financially stable life, a great career, healthy kids or a solid relationship (with yourself or another person). Then, you acknowledge that something is missing. Your life isn’t as rich as you’d like it be, and it’s time for you to explore. Maybe that means taking some risks professionally. It could be just your body telling you it’s time for a break. Or within all of your seeming happiness, you may find yourself stuck.

Action step

Take some time over the next few weeks and write how you’ve been feeling. Or even record yourself on your phone, computer or camera talking about the things you are experiencing internally as they relate to your external life. The whole point of this exercise is to get to know yourself better so you can understand what’s missing.

Whether it be a new personal project, a vacation or anything else, you deserve to live your rich life exactly on your terms. Yes, you are in an incredibly fortunate situation and you are grateful for it daily. But going after that missing piece is integral in creating the life you desire.

Change Your Thoughts to Change Your Wealth

By | Blog, Rich but empty | No Comments

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When your financial reality is one that other people envy, it’s hard to find fault in your actions. You’ve worked hard to create financial security for yourself and your family. And you’ve come to place where you’re ready to focus on your true passions. The problem is that you’re not sure where to start. Your entire life has been centered around accumulating wealth that your decision-making process is a bit skewed. That’s why this week, I want to talk about changing the way you think.

So what is at the center of your life? For many of us – rich, poor and everyone in between – it’s money. Our financial lives are the driving forces behind the vast majority of our decisions. For many of us, our self worth is tied up into our money. We feel both exhilarated and important when we fill our closets and homes with brand new luxuries. But then we simultaneously feel guilt about the amount we spent and our lack of self control.

It’s time to start building wealth from the inside out. As I’ve said a few times before, your self worth should not be connected to your net worth – even if it is more than most. If your goal is more financial freedom with your wealth, maybe you’ll want to focus on building enough assets to allow yourself to earn about half of your regular salary from investments to improve your quality of life. Or maybe your goal is building a different type of asset – becoming a business owner or closing up shop to fund a different dream.

Action step

You have the means to create your ideal life, but you’re having trouble figuring out where to start. Work through those emotions. An important step on your journey to happiness and abundance is to define your ideal life from every aspect. How you define it is by recognizing your dreams as well as your emotions behind your money.

Though money is a big factor in decision making, I want you to take time considering what your ideal life looks like regardless of your financial situation. Don’t think about what you’re supposed to be doing but what you want to do. The world around us teaches us that power is achieved through financial gain; but you know that’s not necessarily the case. Devote some time figuring out what fuels you, feeds your soul and empowers your sense of self. Then, devote your money.

Invest In Yourself

By | Advice from Julie Murphy Casserly, Blog, Rich but empty | No Comments

What do you want to do with your money? Notice I didn’t ask you what you were supposed to do or what your parents said you should do with your money.

Often times in our quest to create a life that we desire, we somehow find ourselves on a path that looks a lot like the one someone else would have for us. Joining the family business is important to dad, so we go to law school. Mom was married with two kids by 30, and she doesn’t let us forget it. And our friends all have their first homes under their belt and we couldn’t imagine being left behind.

Our desires sometimes get buried by the opinions and even actions of others. In some cases, having money makes it harder to create our ideal lives. Joining the family business or marrying an approved partner overrides everything, especially if your idea doesn’t align with the popular opinion.

If you’re reading this blog, it’s safe to assume that you are tired of settling for the financial status quo in your life. You’ve spend time feeling lost, empty and confused; you have money and money creates opportunities, but you are still uncertain on how to use your money to live the life you want. Or maybe, you’re not sure what exactly that “ideal life” even looks like, let alone how to get there.

As you know very well, it’s not about the money you have. It’s about what you do with it. The best investments in life you will ever make are the ones in yourself: your happiness, your health and your passions. So where exactly should you start making investments? Here are a few fun ideas and exercises to get you started.

Think outside the box
The luxury of having money is that it affords you a little creativity. You don’t absolutely have to do any job that doesn’t appeal to you just to make ends meet. Start looking around your current life and asking open-ended questions about everyday things. Push yourself to be as innovative as possible. Thinking outside “the box” stimulates personal and professional growth.

Take a class
Not something your mom says you should. Or something that you go to just because you’re friends are going. Taking a watercolor painting class or volunteering at the local YMCA probably won’t directly lead you to a specific career. However, tapping into your creative side opens your mind to different possibilities and even open up avenues not available to you before.

Do some soul searching
What was your favorite childhood activity (aside from eating ice cream and catching fireflies!)? Go through old photo albums and check out scrapbooks you made when you were younger. Go through all the different activities you were involved in and write them down on a piece of paper. Then, use some innovative thinking to figure out how to recreate those past loves as an adult. So what are you passionate about?

Be grateful
When we are having feelings of inadequacy in one area of our life, we may begin to view other things from a negative lens. When this happens, force yourself to look at the good people and things in your life with eternal gratefulness. Focus on a different type of abundance; look for things in life that fill you with happiness and instill peace. Being genuinely grateful for the mass abundance you already posses opens the door for more abundance to flood every area of your life.

Having money doesn’t automatically assume happiness. You earned the money you have through hard work, sacrifice and dedication. Now, take the time to do the same thing in your personal life. Cultivate creativity in every way you can, don’t shy away from trying new things and be grateful even when you’re don’t feel it. Creating the life you desire is absolutely possible; you simply have to choose it.

Find wealth in your every day life

By | Advice from Julie Murphy Casserly, Blog, Rich but empty | No Comments

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Picture this: you’re financially comfortable yet professionally bored. Your personal relationships leave more than a little to be desired and you feel like something is missing. You feel like there’s a hole – you feel empty – yet on paper, everything is seems ideal.

Having money doesn’t mean you are truly wealthy, and none know that better than those who have a few dollars in the bank. It’s much more difficult to talk about what’s troubling you when people consider your life to be effortless. On the surface, your life seems great – even easy – to those around you. They write off your opinions as that of a person with little life experience and your setbacks as those of one who “has it made.” Nothing is more frustrating when the people you consider friends view your life as simple in a negative way.

But what about you? How do you feel about where you are in your life right now? No matter what material success you can claim in this world, no one’s life is easy. That includes yours. Creating wealth requires a lot of sacrifice, determination and vision. That’s why there are tons of finance books out there dedicated to making your first million or getting rich in 30 days. Maintaining and growing wealth, however, are tasks just as difficult and time intensive. You don’t just move onto Easy Street when you have X amount of dollars in the bank; we still must invest time into our emotional growth and satisfaction.

Action step

Be rich in what you value, not what society values. Like I said before, having money and being wealthy don’t always go hand in hand. What do you love? What makes you laugh with childlike enthusiasm? What excites you?

This week, spend time exploring hobbies, interests and other activities that you truly enjoy. Delve into your free time with the same focus that you do in business. Take seriously those hobbies that you squeeze in between business meetings and must-do tasks. Money doesn’t equal happiness, but having money puts you in a unique position to create something better for yourself immediately. Delve into your enthusiasm – your happy place – and create a life that’s both rich and wealthy.