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Julie Murphy Casserly

3 Ways to Feel Like Yourself Again

By | Advice from Julie Murphy Casserly, Blog | No Comments

Why do we not do things that make us feel good?  It’s that old adage, “Misery loves company” and we get trapped in living a life that we never thought we’d be living.  I have found so many times that we stay stuck because financially we’ve pigeon-holed ourselves into lifestyles, marriages, family expectations, and all those “stable jobs” we think we have.

Is anything in life really ever stable?  We may have the perception that they are stable, but in reality the bottom can drop out at any time.  We have perceived stability.  The only thing that is for sure is that change is inevitable.  Even the stock market has gone up now for over 8 years and it’s making people feel more secure.  When we negotiate ourselves away by doing things like stay at that job you hate going to everyday because it pays the bills, or stay in your marriage that was over years ago for the sake of the kids, or you keep playing the role you’ve always played for family members, but you’re so angry about it, we move farther and farther from what our soul is here to do.

As we move away from our souls desires, we either work things out or we act them out.  We typically act them out through our money or through our health.  Over the past few years, I witnessed a client who came to me to help get herself set up for retirement, she was now turning 40, divorced, no kids, but really wanted to make sure she was taking care of herself financially.  When we started to dig in, she had created over $40,000 of credit card debt, had a six figure income, and owned her own home. To some it appeared she was just fine, but that couldn’t have been farther from the truth.  We sharpened up how she was allocating her money monthly from debt payoff, to spending and to saving for her own retirement and every 90 days we would get together to monitor and measure her progress.  After a year, she had cut the debt down to $10,000 and she was on her way to good financial health.

I had noticed that she had gained about 20 pounds since we started working together, so I decided to ask her how she was doing personally, now that her financials were so much better.  First she spoke of her job, how she hadn’t had a raise in years.  Relationship wise, she was so sad that she was divorced and hadn’t met anyone in the past 5 years because she really wanted to have children and that ship was sailing.  We worked on mapping out her ideal job, what she really wanted to be doing and she wanted to feel valued and acknowledged income wise for all the work she was doing.  Her income from her perspective should have at least been $50K more per year for how hard she was working.  I told her, we only get what we put out there in the world, meaning she will only get what she believes she deserves.  She sat with that conversation and said ok, let’s meet in another six months.

When that time came to meet, she had lost the 15 of the 20 pounds gained, but her credit card debt was back up to $32,000.  Clearly there was a pattern.  She thought, as many do, if I just had more income this debt would just go away.  After 20+ years of doing this work, that couldn’t be farther from the truth.  More income does NOT change one’s patterns on how they emotionally act out with their money. There was some other void in her world that I was determined to get to the bottom of.  

As we continued to have the conversation around work, I started to dig deeper about not getting married again and having a baby.  I thought to myself, my Catholic upbringing beliefs put aside, I said to her, “why do you have to have a man to have a baby?”  She looked at me like I had ten heads.  It was hilarious.  I said, just play with me here.  Let’s brainstorm as to what other avenues there may be to get a baby in your life.  We talked about that she wasn’t interested in giving birth at her age, now mid 40s, but there were other options like surrogacy, adoption, fostering kids, shifting her job to work with kids, etc.  We held a safe space for any of those options to be considered.

She was so ingrained in her belief system from her childhood, that you only have a baby if you are married, she had never thought outside of the box before and this was the first time.  Long story short, she emotionally explored all options, and tested it out with a foster child.  In the end, today, she is a mom.  She has an adopted son and daughter, siblings, and in her early 50s all because she had the courage to step out of the norm.  She attracted a job that not only paid her $50K more per year, but actually about $72K more per year, that came after the babies came.  Another pattern I see all the time, the money doesn’t come until you claim what you deserve.  She wanted to become a mom, when she did, then all the money showed up.  She is now in a healthy relationship, NO credit card debt and skinnier than ever.  She is not acting out her sadness financially; nor in her health.

So, how do you feel like yourself again just like my client?

  1. Start with what feels good today, not what you did or didn’t do, today.  Only Do Things that Make You Giggle
  2. Accept The Reality You’ve Created.  It’s all you really have, just own it.
  3. Let Go of People and Experiences that Suck the Life Out of You

Here’s to much more love and abundance to your world!

Julie

Money…

By | Advice from Julie Murphy Casserly, Blog | No Comments

Money makes the world go round. We love it, we hate it, we have plenty, or we’re always looking for more of it. Money comes to us with such polarity. Money is the center of many divorces. Money is the culprit that instigates countries to fight over who owns the China Sea, or who owns this land or that land. Money is used for power. It also, gives us freedom of choice.

No wonder we are all so messed up around money. We even created fake money, credit. Credit is the illusion that you actually have money to spend and all it does is trap you in the life you have or the more challenging one you are creating for yourself in the future. Credit to most people today is a led balloon.

Over 70% of the world has no interest or negative interest on their money. Think about that! You put your money in the bank for one year and when you take it back out, you get less. That my friends is negative interest rates. If you’re one of those people that lives in a place where that isn’t the case like here in the United States, if you think you’re immune to what the ripple effect of this will be in our global economy, you are surely mistaken.

I was asked when I was up on Capitol Hill in Washington D.C. by a few congressmen and congresswomen, how do we get Americans to save more money? I told them, “you’re asking the wrong question.” They looked at me with this puzzled look on their faces. I said, there is no way you can get people to think and act to save for their future when they are so stuck in their past financial decisions. Those past financial decisions are sitting on the balances of all their credit cards, student loan debt, car loans, personal loans, debt consolidation loans, 401k loans, etc.

It all starts with a compelling reason to change, something that makes us want a different reality then what we have. In my book, Awaken Your Wealth, we will walk you through what that is for you. I will guide you with exercises, case studies and success stories, to help you create what you desire in your life and reboot your relationship to money in what promotes the life you want today.

Come, join my community for updates, and get a free chapter of my new book, Awaken Your Wealth, before it launches!

What is PACT?

By | Advice from Julie Murphy Casserly, Blog | No Comments

Today, many of us create our financial lives by building it from the outside in. Why? Because the entire way our system is set up today from our educational systems, our career systems, our family structures, etc teach us on some level that something outside of us is better than the version that we are. Our systems teach us that we are flawed on some level. That we need to improve what we are not good at as opposed to really focusing on what we are inherently really good at and amplifying those talents.

What we are missing is that we were each put here on this earth for a specific calling. We’ve chosen our careers, and the money we make, to be the center of every decision. Money has become a core value and every decision pushes out from that. So if you don’t have money, you are of no value and if you have a ton of money, you have huge value. I’m here to tell you that this is a bunch of rubbish.

When we put our calling in the center of our lives, we can then build our wealth from the inside out. In the PACT process we redefine what wealth really means to you. Real wealth! We explore how you have defined wealth in the past, how you would like to define it in the future and we align all of your decisions from that definition you create along your journey. We must understand that it is an ever evolving process. We need to allow ourselves to be ok with what is and be ok with what we want to create so that the day we die, we have no regrets. This is real wealth!

Over the years, I have witnessed those who followed their calling, their passion, or otherwise known as life’s purpose, they flourish financially. Even in 2008 and 2009, I watch those that were absolutely passionate at their jobs get $30,000 bonuses while so many were being laid off. Many of those that got laid off hated their jobs, their bosses, their commutes, or their coworkers. When we don’t willingly choose the shift, a life crisis will cause the shift for us. The PACT process gives you tips and tools to guide you along the way to avoid the crisis point. When we love what we do, we are vibrating at a higher energetic frequency because we are having positive emotions, happy and joyful. Then, more good comes our way.

Over the past 20+ years in my calling, I’ve created the PACT system. PACT allows us to create more present moment living, releasing our financial past decisions, and fund the future that we desire. It all starts with making a PACT with yourself. My PACT process allows a person to be in a safe space. And the results from using PACT are sustainable.

I find that those who are ready for the PACT process are those who are seeking change in their lives. Seeking transformation, but are not exactly sure what is out of balance, but they know they want something different. This change could be in your personal life, financial life, work life, or family life. One of these areas of your life is likely dominating over the other ones which is what is causing some of your unhappiness or discontent. It got this way because life is busy, we roll over what are deepest desires are because time just slipped on by and then we realize years have gone by and we are full of a bunch of woulda, shoulda, coulda moments.

Well, that stops today. I invite you to muster up the courage to love yourself enough and call in your shift. Call in a life filled with high quality moments, lots of abundance, including financial abundance. I invite you to join me to make a PACT with yourself to create the life of your dreams.

Come, join my community for updates, and get a free chapter of my new book, Awaken Your Wealth, before it launches!

 

 

Financial Self Love

By | Advice from Julie Murphy Casserly, Blog | No Comments

Wow, this past month has been intense. Who else is with me? All that no longer serves us must fall away. The old model of doing things must go. It’s time for energetic and financial expansion.

When I wrote my first book The Emotion Behind Money, I made reference to sitting on a bar stool. That once you start to shift you can’t ever go back and sit on the same barstool any longer. You start to shift and the common traits you once shared, you realize they are fading away, even if they’ve been friends for years. This has happened to me in a big way this past month.

One of the most financial self-loving things I did this past week was to accept my reality. I loved myself enough to see how I chose to participate in it. Once I really realized the cluster F*#@ that was created I got so sad. Sad how I had been betrayed by those I loved and sad that here I was again. And boy oh boy, did I grieve the fact that I knew better. I started to beat myself up. Ever done that before?

I realized that the sadness that came up wasn’t only about this situation, but it was also about all the times in my life that I did this exact same pattern. For me, I believe people at face value, but that leaves me at risk to be “wowed”, to be “sold a bill of goods with no substantiation”. I over road my own intuition in both instances and I didn’t apply my personal and business knowledge. I gave my power away. I thought someone knew better than me, that they had more authority on what I was doing, then me. That couldn’t have been farther from the truth. It was time for me to take my power back, hold healthy boundaries for myself, take inventory of the reality that was created, and align the situation to what was true for me and take action.

In the process of accepting my reality, a critical step in financial healing, I knew that my emotional body would drum up all kinds of self judgement, shame, blame, and/or guilt. When they came up, I chose to be the observer of those feelings. A response I’ve become very familiar with over the years. This is where I knew healthy boundaries were so important while I moved through both of these situations. For me, healthy boundaries meant that I needed to take a step back and create space for myself first and foremost. Then, evaluate, plan out my action plan to rectify things, then collaborate with others to set things straight.

What was interesting in both scenarios, when I didn’t respond to others demands, they came at me harder. Another test? Absolutely, I was being forced to get this one. They came at me like a bull in a china shop. They even tried to rally the troops against me. They tried to come after me in numbers. I knew I could choose to meet with each group of individuals and allow them to reinforce all my shame, blame, guilt and judgement, or I could choose to do the most self-loving thing. I chose the latter. The most self-loving thing for me was to take a step back, evaluate and see what was true for me. I didn’t engage. I didn’t plug into the energy they had going on because that was their business not mine. My business was to get really in tune with myself.

I realized, AGAIN, that I am a huge giver, and I attract takers. In my giving, I tend to rescue people, particularly financially. I’ve had a pattern of exchanging money for love. But I was doing that with people who don’t even love themselves, so they had no capacity to love me, reinforcing my suffering that I am unlovable. A pattern I thought I had said good bye to years ago. Apparently, I needed to strengthen my self-love muscles. I made a PACT with myself years ago, that I was no longer going to work with vendors, or have friendships, employees, or other relationships that were not mutually beneficial, loving, and reciprocal. This is where I was tested this past month.

I wound up getting into two situations where those I was dealing with were opportunists and they were personally financially destitute, which clouded their decision making process, and they were seeking to be bailed out and tried to make it my problem. Years ago, I would have bailed them out, and then just complained about it for years. What I’ve come to realize, when we do things that are not in alignment with who we are, we store those unprocessed emotions in our nervous systems, only to eventually act out in our health.

I always say, we either work things out or we act them out. We act them out through our money and though our health. This past month, I decided to not act out from shelling out money to people who were out of alignment and I was unwilling to carry their money issues. My body started to get numbing sensations. I know from reading Louise Hay’s book, Heal Your Life, the emotional cause of numbing is “Withholding love and consideration. Going dead mentally.” I was checking out likely because I’ve seen this pattern many times before. It was so stressful for me that I was in this pattern again.

I know many of you are with me on this one, you’ve likely had similar patterns repeat in your life and eventually you feel like you’re beating your head against the wall. Well, it’s time to stand up and love yourself!!!

How did I get out of what I created and how can you as well?

  • I went back and got in tune with what I wanted to create in my life. I loved myself enough to give me the time to do this regardless how much other people were barking at me, and threatening me legally, to do it differently.
  • I evaluated what was true for me, and what was I being “sold” and see what was not in alignment with my highest and best interest.
  • I proactively reached out to those involved to find a collaborative solution.
  • I let go of those who were unwilling to collaborate because that’s not my style.
  • Lastly, I expressed gratitude for all those who showed up for me and for the lessons I learned which helped me build even stronger self-love muscles.

Whew!! It was a process, but my soul came here to do something, and as God and The Universe as my witness, I’m going to do it and nothing is going to stop me, even the lessons. Bless your lessons along the way. Thanks for reading…..

Look out this spring for my new book Awaken Your Wealth will be coming out which will be a roadmap which I call the PACT process which allows you to walk yourself through the most self-loving path to financial wellness on all levels.   Come like my Facebook page to join a community that is all about financial abundance and support you in creating the financial life that you desire.

Namaste,

Julie